Wow, He Can Be Kind of a Jerk...

That clever title up there is a direct quote from The Hubs. And who do you think he was referring to when making this not so nice observation? Was it a snarky Canadian we ran in to on our trip? A pushy flight attendant on our AirCanada flight last week? Oh no, nothing like that...he was referring to none other than Mr. L.

His honesty struck me hysterical because it's so true. Can you imagine if any adult behaved as a toddler does?

• Throwing a sippy cup of milk across the table because he's run our of eggs (because he's eaten them all)
• Swatting at a person because he's just woken up but isn't quite awake
• Screams bloody murder when told a store is closing and he needs to go home
• Flails his arms and legs when on a boat in the middle of the water for no apparent reason (not that I would know anything about that!)

But he's not a jerk...he's a toddler just trying to find his way amongst the boundaries that I set for him. But I'd rather have him act like a frustrated "jerk" now, then a spoiled brat in a few years when all hope is gone of ever turning him into a well behaved gentleman!

Savoring The Good Times

Life isn't always perfect, everyone knows that. Parenthood lets you know that just about every day. The Hubs and I have had our share of tough times while navigating our way through this world of parenting, and sometimes it's easy to take your partner for granted and to feel like you do all the work. I know I play the martyr sometimes and I'm sure it drive The Hubs insane.

But right now, as we're on a great vacation, I'm trying to savor the good times so that I can keep them in my pocket for the next rough patch and pull them out and appreciate what I have. Today was a rough day. We rented a boat for the morning and while it started out fantastic, Mr. L had a monumental breakdown 1/2 way through our outing and The Hubs and I were at each other trying to figure out what to do. It certainly wasn't the finest moment for any of us (As our toddler lay on the floor of the boat WAILING his brains out, I sit behind him trying to do my best to ignore him and let him scream it out, all the while The Hubs (who isn't privy to this type of behavior often) is trying his best to keep everyone happy and getting nowhere while doing it), and while our afternoon has gotten better, we're still feeling some annoyance from hours before (The Hubs and I that is, Mr. L couldn't care less about how he acted on the open seas). But as i sit here typing, a smile is brought to my face and I'm forgetting about all of teh tension I felt before as I hear my amazing husband take a shower with our darling son. He's treating him with such kindness and care. Making sure to make shower-time fun for Mr. L while still doing a great job at getting him as clean as possible and not missing any spots. I feel blessed to have a husband this involved. To have a husband who wants to be this involved. A husband who had 3 weeks of vacation time and chose to spend it with us in a location where spending time with his wife and child would be easy and stress free.

I hope the next time we have a tough day, I can reflect on how I'm feeling now and just let my tension go and enjoy this life that I'm living.

We Made It!

Hello blog world! The Hubs, Mr. L and I arrived in Canada a couple of days ago and are having an amazing time so far! I'm not sure if it's because The Hubs is with me, or if it's because we're staying in a much smaller house than our own, but I've been able to relax just as much as The Hubs as so far! I was anticipating calling this three week adventure a "VACATION" for me because I've heard from my other Mommy friends that a family vacation with kids never ends up being a vacation for Mommy. We've only been here for a couple of days, but so far this has been a vacation for all of us. Mr. L hasn't been on his exact schedule on any day, but I'm ok with that. He's taken his nap a bit later in the day, but slept for the same amount of time as he does back home. He's been going to bed later and waking up at the same time which isn't the best, but it is what it is.

I'm not sure how much I'll be blogging while I'm on vacation, but I'll try to do my best to keep updating everything!

What To Pack For Baby: The Not So Obvious List

Since The Hubs and I lived in LA when we first had Mr. L and our families were spread out all along the West coast, we've traveled with our little man several times. And while it still always adds a little bit of stress to our travels, I will say that each time gets easier and easier. Through our trips I've learned a few things about what's useful to bring and what's a waste of space. There's nothing worse than arriving in your destination and realizing you didn't pack what is suddenly a very necessary item. You rush out, buy it and don't use it again once you're home because what you just purchased is a duplicate item of something you already have at home. To help you make sure you put all items, even those that are less obvious, in your suitcase I've created the following list to cover all the bases. Enjoy!

• Bedding: Obviously, you'll bring a blanket along for your baby, but if your child is going to be sleeping in a Pak N Play or a crib that isn't their own while you're away, you'd be wise to pack a crib sheet that they normally use at home. It will look, smell and feel just like they are at home and if a baby feels at home they will sleep better. And we all know that if baby is sleeping better, YOU will sleep better!

• Sun Protection: Mr. L hates having the sun in his eyes. If we're in the car and he doesn't have the sunshade down, he's a wreck if he's trying to catch some Z's. Our family usually takes trips to Seattle where a sunshade is not needed 90% of the time. But for our next trip, we're going to a place where some rays may actually kiss our rental car. I realized the other day while driving around that I need to add our car sunshade to my packing list. Because I do not want to rush to a store, buy whatever item is available at whatever cost, only to get home and never use it because we have sunshades in our cars already.

• Bath Slip Mat: When traveling to an unfamiliar destination, you never know what you're going to find. If you're staying in a hotel on your trip, chances are the bathtub is already lined with non-slip textures to keep your little one upright during bath time. But if you're staying with friends, or renting a home you can never be too sure. On our next trip, we don't even know if there's a bathtub in the home or just showers (Forgot to check that out when finalizing everything!) so to be on the safe side, I'm packing Mr. L's non-slip bath mat to lay down in whatever we may find in the bathroom - bathtub or shower. Sure, Mr. L would be fine for one or two baths without a mat, it's not like I'd make The Hubs rush out at 7pm to get a mat, but it's just so much easier if you have one, so pack it!

• A familiar swing or chair (For the little ones when possible): 4 weeks after Mr. L was born, our new family of 3 (Plus my Mom) packed up our Tahoe and headed 8 hours North to San Francisco (crazy right?). I'm so grateful that my Mom was with us as we were packing up our car because she gave us one crucial piece of advice; "bring the baby swing". The Hubs and I looked at her like she was crazy. How would we fit that beast of a swing into the car? WHY would we want to? My Mom just snickered and told us that we'd thank her later if we brought it. Cut to 9 hours later and we were thanking her. Having that one piece of soothing familiarity was priceless for our weekend get away. We had constant visitors on that trip and while everyone wanted to hold the new baby, there were times when HE didn't want to be held by anyone (including me) and he just needed his sleep. We would tuck him into his swing and within a few minutes he was out and couldn't be disturbed. It was heaven. I realize that it isn't always possible to bring such a large piece of equipment; especially if you're flying, so if that's the case I would recommend asking around if you can borrow one from someone in the area you're visiting. If you're heading out to new territory then I would look into renting one. Many major cities have stores where you can rent baby equipment while you're visiting. This is one instance where spending money on an item you already have at home is a good thing.

Those are the main areas that have affected us in our travels since having a child. I hope these tips can trigger something in your mind and remind you to pack something that you may not have thought of otherwise and will save you a lot of time and money!

 Safe travels!

Happy Mother's Day

It's a holiday for us! For the Mom's of the world! For the alarm clocks, the chef's, the toddler chasers, the stylists, the diaper changers, the tantrum tamers, the taxi drivers, the schedulers, the tear stoppers and the best friends. A day where we and all that we do is celebrated! Where our families take a moment to appreciate our role in their lives and we are given that always needed High-5 to keep us going for another year.

So what do we want more than anything on this day? To immerse ourselves in Motherhood? Spend all day with our husband and children? Heck To The NO! Here's my dream Mother's Day that will hopefully happen sometime in my lifetime:

- My child(ren) wake up late in the morning, and when they do they make a specific wake up cry that ONLY my husband can hear so I can continue to sleep peacefully.
- I eventually wake up around 11am to my child(ren) nudging me gently and telling me he has breakfast in bed for me. Breakfast consists of a large glass of milk and a fantastic chocolate doughnut with sprinkles (That will not make me gain even an ounce of weight).
- After breakfast, my husband tells me there's a surprise waiting for me outside...I venture outside and see a limo with my BFF sitting inside. He's sending us to a spa for the day where we will have massages, facials and endless mimosas. When we're done being pampered, we are to lounge by the pool until our hearts content.
-By the time we leave the spa, the child(ren) have long been in bed. I waltz back inside my home to find the house cleaned, dishes done and laundry folded.
- I walk upstairs and go to bed and am fully refreshed or rejuvenated for the next year.

Do I deserve that kind of fantasy? Eh...some days, yes...most days, probably not...but a Mom can dream right?!

I do find it funny that most Mom's I know want nothing more for Mother's Day than to feel like they are NOT a Mom. We want the Father's to play our role on this day. We want to sit back and enjoy the view while someone else picks up the slack. That's my plan for tomorrow anyway; and it will definitely include a chocolate doughnut with sprinkles.

Happy Mother's Day to all of the Mom's out there! I hope your day starts late, ends early and is nothing but perfection in the middle! You deserve it!

Sleep, Glorious Sleep!

Mr. L is an early riser. He's not one of those kids who I have to wake up at 8am because "he's just sleeping too long and we need to get our day started." Umm...no, those words have never left my mouth. Mr. L has always been an early riser, I remember when I first went back to work when he was 4 months old (well, really, he was 3 months ,3 weeks and 1 hour old but who's counting?) I would get up at 4am just so I could get ready in ample time before he woke up! But lately, his wake-up call (Literally) has been coming a little too early. And I'm not just saying that because I'm tired and I wish he would sleep longer (but to be honest, I AM tired and I DO wish he would sleep longer), but he'd be getting up calling for Mommy, demanding breakfast and Elmo but he'd be beyond tired and more cranky than I'd prefer! By 10am his eyelids were getting heavy and there have been several days when I'm contemplated putting him down for a nap much earlier than his regular schedule just to give him some relief! I started doing some research and was learning that Mr. L was not getting enough sleep. Sure, we were putting him to bed at a descent hour but he was keeping himself up at night just talking to Elmo and Mr. Bear and it would be at least an hour after we said goodnight that he would finally fall asleep. Even on days that we would accidentally put him to bed late, he would still stay up talking to himself and would get up at the same early time the next morning. Finally, I was at my wits end and started picking my brain for a solution. It was then that I remembered something my LA Mommy friends talked about when they were trying to get their kids to sleep later. It was, what they called, "the bunny alarm clock"; I found one on Amazon and ordered it right away.

Kid'Sleep Classic Clock

 
This "bunny alarm clock" (actual name is the Kid'Sleep Classic) arrived at our doorstep a few days later and I couldn't wait to show it to Mr. L and explain to him how it worked. I told him that when the bunny was sleeping, then that meant Mr. L should be sleeping too. But when the bunny was awake and walking, it meant that Mr. L could call for Mommy and it was time to get up! I assumed it would take several days if not weeks to get Mr. L to understand this concept, but to my surprise (And joy), he slept in the very next morning! We're on day 5 of using the alarm clock and he's woken up at least1 hour later than his regular wake up time each morning (2 mornings out of the 5 I've set the alarm an extra hour later because he was put to bed late)! 2 of these mornings, Ive actually woken up before Mr. L and have had the opportunity to just lay in bed, gather my plan for the day and even read a book! I know, it's kind of like I'm in Heaven.

Mr. L has been enjoying the benefits of this new clock as well. I know this because he's woken up each morning talking. He's not screaming, he's not crying, he's talking with his stuffed animals or just to himself and it's so great. There have been a couple of mornings when he's started crying, but we've ignored him and within 10 minutes he's gone back to sleep until the bunny wakes up (in the days before the bunny clock, Mr. L would wail for 30-45 minutes before The Hubs and I would give up and go get him). Another point to add is that Mr. L has been sleeping better in his naps as well. I know that for kids, sleep begets sleep (Meaning the more they sleep during the day, the more they will sleep at night), so maybe this works in reverse too (the more they sleep at night, the more sleep they'll get during the day). He's been consistently getting 2 hours if not 2.5 hours of sleep each day in the afternoon.

It's a nice change of pace here in the Laubster household. Mommy and Baby are getting ample amounts of sleep and all is right with the world!

A Day Out Does a Mommy Good!

So sometimes I can be weird. I can be weird about normal, every day things. Sometimes, I will feel bad about running errands with Mr. L because I feel like he'll think his day consists of riding between his carseat and the shopping cart. So 9 times out of 10, I'll avoid running personal errands and instead I"ll devote my day to Mr. L. I'm fine giving more time and attention to him than I do to myself, but sometimes it starts to feel very unbalanced and I start going crazy.

For the past few weeks, I've had some items that I needed to return to a store. I put off returning them because of the reasons I mentioned above. I didn't want Mr. L's day to turn into errand after errand for Mommy. I waited for some "me time" to pop up, but things have been pretty busy around here, and no time presented itself for me to escape for a few hours. So earlier this week, I took measures into my own hands and called up a girlfriend to see if she wanted to meet Mr. L and I for a morning of shopping and catching up in a nearby town. I figured if there was someone else with me, it would be more exciting for Mr. L than just hanging out with Mommy for another day. See? I'm weird.

So Mr. L and I got up and got ready to leave right away. I wanted to get to where we were going early so we could walk around before there were large crowds. Getting to downtown before the stores open turned out to be the best thing we could have done. Normally, when we're out and about in crowds I'm pretty strict about having Mr. L stay in his stroller. I have crazy fears that he'll dart out in to traffic, or will run crazily down the street like a rabid dog. Because we arrived at our destination before the stores were open, there wasn't anyone around us. So I felt fine about giving Mr. L some freedom to wander around. Taking some time to go on a walk with a toddler is probably one of the most fun things I've ever done. The things that they notice is unbelievable. On  this particular day, we were walking past shops I've walked past probably 50 times in my lifetime; and yet, had i ever noticed the totem poles next to the yogurt shop? Or the Alligator sculpture near the parking garage entrance? And how could I ever have missed "Bucky" the humongous bronze buck just outside Nordstrom? I had never noticed any of these "friends" but Mr. L noticed them immediately. He did so great walking with me. I kept telling him that he could let go of my hand and walk ahead of me or next to me, but he didn't want to. He gladly grabbed a hold of my thumb and escorted me from sculpture to sculpture. We hit up Starbucks and got ourselves a treat (A venti iced tea for Mommy and a veggie snack for Mr. L) and sat on a bench to watch a fountain. Once again, Mr. L pointed out an item I'd never seen before; a bear and a bunny topiary pair right next to the fountain! He insisted we take a picture with his new friend Bear...

Bear, Mr. L & Mommy

Once we met up with our friend, the day just got better. She was able to add some new energy to our duo, and she was also able to entertain Mr. L as I tried a few things on, which was a major plus in my mind. At one store, we both tried things on so I, of course, took Mr. L with me into the dressing room. I let him out of the stroller and he was in heaven! Crawling all over the bench in the room, looking at himself in the mirror, and of course, calling for our friend who was in the next room over (And knocking on the wall every so often making sure she was still in there). After a few hours, we were all getting hungry, but I wasn't sure how it would go with Mr. L. He was at that critical point of the day where he could either be up for a meal at a restaurant and being out in a social environment would encourage a happy attitude, or he was going to crash and burn so badly as soon as we sat down that we'd be blacklisted from that restaurant for all eternity. Thankfully, he was a perfect, social angel. He made friends with the women at the next table over, played hard to get with a little girl in the corner and even sang a few songs for anyone who would listen (And by that, I mean for anyone with in a 2 block ear range as he was basically SCREAMING his bear song for all to hear).

By the time we headed back home, we were both ready for a nap. But it was a great morning. We both got a change of scenery and had fun changing up our regular routine. I felt refreshed and satisfied that I got some adult time with a Non-Mommy friend who had more things to talk to me about than children!! And to be honest, I don't think Mr. L realized he was being forced to run errands with Mommy, I'm pretty sure he thought I took him to the coolest sculpture/fountain zoo in the whole world. Well, whatever works!!

I'm a Travel Wimp...But I'm Ok With It

I've talked some big talk over the last few months about the extravagant European vacation The Hubs, Mr. L and I are going to take this month. I bought a new stroller so we could navigate the narrow streets of Italy more easily. I spent hours upon hours reading up on how to travel with a toddler; where to stay, when to fly, what tours to take etc.

So are our bags packed and are we ready to hop on a red-eye 14 hours flight from SFO to FLR?

Nope.

Not at all.

Not even close.

Why? Because I'm a travel wimp. The Hubs and I are both novice travelers at best. While we've left the continental US, we haven't left it by much. We've been to Hawaii, Puerto Rico and The Caribbean; but in my opinion that's not really traveling. Combining our lack of traveling with the fact that we'll have a toddler with us just made everything seem too overwhelming. Now, I'm sure many of you are rolling your eyes and are saying "My child's been to 80 countries already and he's only 6 months old!" and ot you I say; fantastic...for YOU. There's nothing worse than going on a vacation if you already know you are going to be too stressed out to enjoy yourself from the time you board the plane to GO to Italy to the time you get OFF the plane back in the states. I'm a worrier; I always have been and I'm sure I always will be. Traveling to other countries honestly freaks me out. I've seen one too many movies about BAD things happening in other countries to be able to totally let my guard down (Never, EVER watch The Lifetime Movie channel when home alone on a Saturday night, or you may come across this gem and be scarred for life). Now, I'm not so dumb that I believe bad things can't happen here in our own country, I know that they can, but if things go down HERE, I'll at least have some sense of where to go and what to do. If someone steals my kind while walking through the streets of Venice, I don't think I can row a Gondola fast enough to get him back!

To give ourselves some credit, we did begin planning an amazing trip to Italy, but when you start fighting with your hubs before you're even ON vacation, it's not a good sign. We quickly realized that our inexperience with travel was working against us. We had more advice than we could have asked for from several or our traveling friends, but we still had no idea what we were doing. We felt caught between this desire to have an amazing dream vacation and the reality of having a 2 year old with us who, no matter how hard we tried to fight it, would rule our daily schedule. We didn't want to settle down in more than 3 places for our entire trip, and yet we wanted to visit places that were so far in between our  overnight destinations that we would have spent the majority of the day traveling only to spend 2 or 5 hours in a place we really wanted to see. We couldn't justify spending a lot of money on a trip that wouldn't be everything we wanted it to be.

So we took a step back and realized that we didn't need to travel across the pond to get the time away we were craving (I say that because we also briefly looked at London...or should I call it L$nd$n). Instead, we looked to our friendly/always happy/good healthcare having neighbors to the North! That's right folks, The Laubster's are heading to Canada, eh!

This is the picture that came up when I Googled "Canada Family Vacation" obviously it's a sign.

The main purpose of our trip is to relax and to spend some quality time together as a family of 3. We were worried that if we went anywhere in Europe we would be consumed with sightseeing and be burdened with timezone changes, language barriers and wanting to see more things than we had time to leisurely see. By renting a gorgeous waterfront home in Canada, we will definitely get the relaxation we need, and  we'll be able to have a great time while avoiding all of the downsides to traveling halfway across the world!


The Hubs and I both have a fun connection to Canada. The Hubs' family is actually from Canada (His Mom moved to California when she was 8), and being that I'm from Seattle, I have very fond memories of visiting Canada as a kid for weekend getaways.

The Hubs and I will make it to Europe one day. Either without our kids, or with our kids when they are old enough to spend a full day sightseeing without taking a nap.

We don't leave for a few more weeks, but I'm so excited. And oddly enough, I'm not stressed. This is coming from the same person who tends to get stressed when I head back home to Seattle for a couple of weeks. But there's something about this trip that just puts me at ease. Maybe it's because we have nothing on the agenda yet. Maybe its because I was mentally preparing myself for a 14 hour red eye flight with a 2 year old sitting on my lap and landing in a country where I wouldn't speak the language and would have no idea where anything was and the thought of "just going to Canada" is so much more simple I can't find a reason to be stressed. But whatever it is, I am so looking forward to this trip and the time we'll get to spend together!

Oh, Canada! I love you already!

Coping With The Baby Stage

Lately, I've been focusing a lot on coming to terms with life as a Mother. That may seem strange since I've been a mother for almost 2 years, and one would think I'm fully adjusted by this point. And in some cases, I am and I'm loving this life more than my non-mommy life, but The Hubs and I are also at a turning point in our life as parents and we're trying to figure out if we should start trying to have another child NOW or later (Granted, the difference between now and later is about 6 months and 2 vacations). What I'm struggling with is trying to figure out if I'm at a point to sacrifice my body again. Getting pregnant means I will be giving my body up for at least 19 months (10 months pregnant - feeling like crap, eating the best foods (k, that ones not so hard to do), feeling tired, gaining weight, ceasing to drink alcohol or go in hot tubs plus however long I end up breastfeeding for - with Mr. L it was 10 months). It's a lot and it's a big sacrifice. I also have Mr. L to think about. He's at such an amazing age, I'm not sure if I want to distract myself from gobbling up all that he is by being pregnant or having a newborn. But then again, Mr. L will always be at an amazing age, and in my heart of hearts I do want more children (4 in total if I had my druthers, but The Hubs has put a stop to much talk after 3 bambinos) and I need to start looking at the big picture of growing our family and how amazing that will be and stop looking at the little picture of what I'll be missing out on over the next several months. In between all of these discussions I've also been having discussions with two of my good friends who are also in "the baby making stage" of life and we joke that we will never be able to go on a girls weekend, or go out for a carefree night on the town because one of us will have to go pump, or someones husband will call because the infant woke up and needs to be nursed, or we're just so darn tired that staying up past 9pm on it's own is a struggle without even adding in a glass of wine. We joke that we'll get around to hanging out and having some fun when we're 40.

The last time I had this discussion with my friends, it hit me. THAT's what those women are always doing. When you go on vacation to somewhere fun; be it Las Vegas, or Mexico you always see a "gang" of women aged somewhere between 40 and 45 enjoying several cocktails and having what appears to be the best time of their life. They never have husbands or boyfriends with them; it's just a girls trip. Whenever I've seen these women I've always thought "That is awesome. I bet they've been doing this trip for 20 years with this same group of girls and every year they pick a new destination and just have an absolute ball." But now that I think about it, I don't think that's the case at all. I think this is probably the FIRST time they've all been able to get out, have some fun and not worry about babies, breastfeeding or sleep since they had children! They've finally reached that time in their lives where they can focus on themselves again, and I think that is fabulous. I'm sure whenever these groups of women are out and about, young men think they are cougars, but they are the farthest thing from it. They want nothing to do with you, Mr. 20 year old, they want everything to do with themselves and their friends. They want an uninterrupted weekend where they don't have to set an alarm, they can eat at restaurants where they will be served instead of being the server and they want to dance to music that is not sung by a giant purple dinosaur!

Before babies...will we ever look this well rested again?

Realizing that I'm not at the "girls weekend" stage of life anymore, or yet depending on how you look at it, is a little depressing to think about sometimes if I'm being perfectly honest. But one of my girlfriends gave me some perspective the other day when saying "We're in the family stage of life. We made a choice and decided to have children. So that means that right now, life is chaotic and crazy and there isn't a lot of room for spontaneity. But it's where we're at and we need to embrace that and enjoy it." And she's absolutely right. If we're constantly living our days wishing we could be doing things we did before we had children we're going to miss out on all of the AMAZING things happening right in front of us.

So here's to living in the moment, loving what you have today and looking forward to a girls weekend with my best friends in about 10 years or so when we'll be running out the door for the airport, dancing until we drop in the clubs and sleeping in as long as we want because no one will be there to wake us up.

I can't wait! But until then, I'm fine playing with playdoh, teaching my kids how to count and singing lullabies before bedtime until they're too old for all of that.